I feel like a super naive idealist who never believed they were idealist until something fucked up happens and the REAL grid of idealism and realism is materialized one night you're stoned as hell analyzing "how the eff does this happen?" and then you question your small reality until you felt extreme anxiety -the anxiety that stems from discovering a different reality outside of yourself. 
thought my outlook was normal, mid-grid. like I thought it was really hard for people to be so intentionally fucked up and i also thought, most people thought the same way. 

jesus.

I'm buying a ticket after winter quarter
will be traveling India via motorcycle