Sunday, October 31, 2010

Happy Halloween. I wrote a short story for you.

 The men were drinking their morning coffee, reflecting on the sexiest women in the sexiest costumes from the night before. "I was going to be crazy cat lady and sew stuffed cats on my ugly sweater, hehe" says Vera. No one pays attention except her best friend, George. He makes fun of her but she doesn't think it's funny and uncomfortable settles into her.

 Vera goes to Goodwill with George. She is looking for a white or cream dress that will drape over her. She wants to be Artemis, the moon goddess. Artemis seems pretty. She finds an OK dress. She buys it and George buys polyester pants.

They walk to the farmers market. Vera asks George,
"So you guys really like slutty costumes the best, always?" She knows she is feeling bad about herself. She thinks about her stupid devil horns at home and fishnet tights and big shoes.
"Yea," George answered but with cold shoulder.
Vera feels loneliness. She thinks George is annoyed at her. They don't speak to each other the rest of the walk.

At home Vera takes a shower and washes her hair. She has one missed call from Rob. Rob is nice. She calls Rob back.
"What are you guys doing tonight. I'm meeting up with George right now." He tells Vera.
"George and I are going to an adult costume party. I don't know the couple hosting it."
"What time?"
"I don't know."
Vera hangs up and calls George. He doesn't answer.

Vera continues the process to objectify her self. She puts on fake eyelashes, makeup, and hair extensions. She feels insecure but attractive in a sense. She looks at her phone. No missed calls. She lays on her bed with big shoes. She looks at her phone. No missed calls. She gets up and looks in the mirror for five minutes. She looks at her phone. No missed calls. She lays back. Vera thinks about Halloween costumes, about her old pictures, they bother her. She has pictures on facebook when she lived in a university town and Vera and her sorority sisters dressed up and looked dumb. She thinks about the pictures, wearing devil horns with underwear, Mermaid with mid drift, lion in a mini dress, cat in underwear. "Fuck. Stupid" thinks Vera. She feels obese this Halloween but isn't. She's hungry and thinks, "no."

George calls her. George comes over while Vera is brushing her teeth. She laughs at his costume and toothpaste dribbles down her chin. He is wearing a cowboy outfit with a gallon hat. He doesn't say much about her outfit but looks at her alot.
"Lets go to Robs and drink a beer before we go to the party."
"Okay. I need to touch up my makeup first though."
"Why? No you don't."
"Yea, well, I am."
Vera asks George if he is driving.
"No, we're walking".
"I'll drive, I don't want to get wet and my shoes are so big."
George looks annoyed and is acting annoyed. Vera questions her actions. Vera wants to smoke pot first and finish her beer. She wants George to "fuck off". She feels bad. She drives to Robs house, four blocks away.

Rob and his girlfriend are nice. They like George's costume and his hat.
Rob asks Vera, "What are you?"
"I'm the devil, I mean, it's obvious."
"Yea but you don't have a tail."
George says, "It's like devil horns and lots of leg."
"Yea", says Rob.
Rob's girlfriend says, "she's a cute devil... you could be going as a playboy bunny though."
Vera sits down by Robs girlfriend. They smoke a bowl but Vera only takes 2 puffs. George and Vera leave and the two walk outside. Vera says,
"I can't drive. I mean, I don't think I should."
George looks pissed off. "No. What are you asking? Don't get so fucked up then."
Vera thinks about not going. She drives and is really paranoid.

At her apartment George ignores her. She wants to ask him what is wrong but assumes it will make everything more uncomfortable then George does something rude. Vera tells George,
"You're being rude to me. Is everything okay?"
George says she is being a bitch. Vera can't tell if he is kidding or not. Vera opens ITunes and while it's loading George goes upstairs. Vera turns it off. She heads outside to smoke. George walks down the stairs and says,
"weren't you going to play music!"
Vera sighs and replies, "well, you went upstairs and I'm going outside, so..."
George walks upstairs. Vera goes outside and smokes. George comes outside. Vera shows George her new skis. They talk about the skis and Vera feels uncomfortable. George tells her she is holding them wrong.

Their friends pull up and honk. George and Vera get into Vera's car. Vera drives following their friends, June and Landon. George is quite. Vera wishes she was home. She' trying though.
"Hey. Have you ever watched the TED talks videos?"
"No." George has not.
" I think you will like them, really informative and inspiring."
She explains the videos she watched and how moving they were. George is unimpressed and doesn't say anything. Vera thinks, "awkward".

They arrive at the party. June is a nature fairy. Landon is Jesus. They walk inside and it's okay. Vera doesn't know anyone. She knows she won't stay long. Vera sees lots of food and is still hungry. She wants to eat cheese and crackers but is scared George will say something mean. She feels like she looks stupid. "Everyone is kind of stuck up", she thinks, "No one here is partying" and "lame" and "cocaine would be nice." The hosts have a game. The hosts are pinning a Halloween character's name on every ones back with out the person seeing what it is. Everyone can ask two yes or no questions for every person they talk to. Vera doesn't know yet but hers says "jail bait". 

Vera gets a keg cup and fills it, then drinks it. Vera is bored. George isn't acting bored but Vera can tell he is. Vera hangs out with June and Landon most of the time. She fills up her next cup but only foam comes out of the keg. "Time to go" she thinks. She walks by George. He sees her empty cup and says,
"Are you going to fill up your cup?"
He points his empty cup at her empty cup.
 "Kegs empty" she says. She sits down next to him. He doesn't acknowledge her. Vera asks George a question about the Halloween persona tag on her back.
George says, "No. It's like not a person."
"Like an adjective?" Vera asks.
George says, "Yea, like an adjective."
Landon walks by with a full cup and says, "you guys, fill up your cup. There is beer over there."
George gets up hastily and says, "what the hell!"

Vera goes inside and dances with Jesus for half of one song. She is trying. She walks back outside and finds George.
"I think I'm ready to go. Do you want to ride back with Landon or go with me?"
"There's no room in Landon's truck."
"Oh. I'm ready to go soon."
Landon and June walk over to them. June and Landon both suggest Vera should get a drink. Vera reminds them shes driving. June tells Vera she's proud, 
"You're being so responsible, that's awesome!"
"Yea, thanks."
George looks pissed and ignores Vera.
"Well I'm going to head out guys."
Landon and June both disagree: "No. Right now?"
Vera answers them, "Yea."
George tells Vera that both of them should go inside and say their goodbyes.

Vera finds the hostess and gives her a hug. Vera thinks "she fucking hates me." Vera is very polite and let's the host know she is grateful. She walks to her car. George pees next to her car. They leave the driveway and George says,
"I think I'm just tired."
"Yea, your energy was rubbing off on me."
"Oh. So it's all on me right. Cool."
Vera tells herself, "George is mean". She thinks "I wish I was a better person."
George says, "The music sucked."
Vera tells George, "It's hard to dance in costumes sometimes."
"How is that even relevant to what I was saying!"
Vera thinks "you deserve this asshole" and says,
"Well, fuck. Like, big awkward hats, dangling fringe on your costume, big shoes, holding a cane! I don't know! I guess it's not fucking relevant, right?!"  
Vera isn't mad though. Vera feels calm. She feels better now. George says something rude and debasing back. Vera tells George,
"just shut the fuck up! Don't fucking talk for the rest of the ride back!"
George is quite. It takes fifteen minutes to get back. Vera takes deep breaths driving home. "I'm a really good driver," she thinks. They get back to Vera's place and she asks George,
"Do you want me to drop you off at your car or at your place?" 
His car is at her place.
George says, "my car." George gets out of Vera's car.

Vera pulls into her garage and shuts the garage door. She feels good. She washes her face. Vera smokes a bowl and lays in bed. Vera talks to her cat. Vera reads some poetry. Her phone goes off. Vera looks at the phone an it's a message from George:

I am sorry. I don't get it sometimes. Smile and thank you for going.


Chelsea Pants said...

heavy. i feel like i got it. i am sorry and yet i think you extracted the purpose. this is something i would have read in college; published in a pamphlet, which would have made it even more distinct to me and all others than read it. you are uh-maz-ing. <3

marti pants said...